My Snapshot

Today I had the unfortunate experience of burying one of my closest friends, Autumn Roy.  Autumn and I went to  the University of New England and she was one of the first people I ever met there.  We both got to school early for preseason cross-country and hit it off immediately, but how could anyone not hit it off with Autumn?  She was an absolutely incredible human being with an outgoing personality and a spirit drenched in positivity.  We spent that preseason playing Nintendo 64 (yes, it was that long ago) while I tried to school her in Bond and Mario Kart.  What I didn't realize as I was sitting there next to her was that this was someone that was going to have a major influence over my life.  I could tell she was funny, a little naive, and pretty cute; but I never thought I would meet a 17-year old girl that could have such an impact on me.

Autumn came into UNE as one of the best runners on the team.  I don't think she knew how good she was going to be when she showed up but it didn't take long for her, or any of us, to see that this crazy girl was our new #1 female.  Autumn epitomized toughness, hands down.  She never left anything on the course and I quickly became the person that would catch her at her finish line because if I hadn't been there she would have fallen straight to the ground as soon as she crossed.  Autumn was extremely familiar with what pain was but you never knew it by looking at her.  Whether it was her leg, her shoulder, whatever; it never stopped her from getting to that starting line and giving it all she had.  She is my reason for fighting through (or ignoring in some cases) the pain because I watched this girl, a phenomenal athlete push it to the limit every single time.  There was no stopping, it was just go till you collapse.  After watching her run how can I ever possibly find a reasonable excuse to NOT finish a race?  I watched her run races with one arm taped to her body...literally.  Are you kidding me? The second I hear that gun go off Autumn is always with me.  And anytime I feel like I want to quit I can hear her in my head cheering me on.  And any time I need that last push to get me through the finish line I close my eyes, take a deep breath, hear her and just go.

Autumn and I never lost touch with each other and although we probably didn't see each other as much as we should have we still made sure to check in with each other.  I always told her about the latest girl and she always wanted to make sure she could approve before it got too serious.  But of course me always being thousands of miles away that never happened, but she wanted me to know that it had to anyway.  We always said we'd be in each other's weddings no matter what our significant others said.  And if we couldn't find someone by 40 we'd just marry each other (I'm pretty sure we said 30 first but then realized that was coming faster than we realized and with her meeting and falling madly in love with Brian and me with whomever it was at the time we thought it wise to push it way back.)

When I came back for my cousin's wedding in June we were lucky enough to spend a lot of time together.  We went to a double-header at Fenway with my dad and spent a couple days just hanging at her apartment watching movies and ordering take-out.  So when a friend asked today, "What's your snapshot?" I couldn't answer right away.  A hundred snapshots of Autumn shot through my head at that moment.  Is it her driving Brad and I back from the bar (a stick-shift) with one arm (obviously the other was in a cast)??  Is it that first meeting when we just hit it off and started playing video games in a barren dorm room? Her making all of us laugh at one of the many races we had together? Or when we met up in Jacksonville to tailgate at the Patriot's Superbowl victory over the Eagles and started the morning with power-hour at 8am? Or my most recent memories of us at Fenway or watching the Hunger Games?  To me these memories are all one big snapshot but the one lasting impression that Autumn has left me is her toughness, perseverance, and how much she truly cared for her family and friends.  She always put everyone else ahead of her own needs and never wanted to see anyone unhappy, no matter how much pain she was in.  Autumn Roy influenced many people in her life and she will be missed greatly.

I love you and miss you terribly Autumn, I'll see you at the finish line.